Gwnewch y pethau bychain

Toy Story

This post contains TMI of an adult nature and, while it contains only text, may nonetheless be non-worksafe if your workplace is really, really uptight.

In the course of being out and about and shopping yesterday, we decided to amuse ourselves by dropping by one of Atlanta’s fine adult emporiums, The Love Shack in Norcross, to see if anything fun might catch our eye and pick up the few odd things. I really like this store better than most of it’s kind. It’s a large, airy space, with wide aisles and an open, uncrowded atmosphere. The staff are friendly without being creepy, and extremely knowledgeable about their products. (As the manager pointed out in a conversation we had, once you have to actually inventory the stuff, it’s just retail product.)

While we were pursuing the Great Wall O’ Vibraty Goodness, a question occurred to kitanzi that I had no answer for. To be honest, I’m just as stumped as she is, and so I turn to you, because all knowledge is contained on my friends list, to ask this seminal and provocative question.

Why do vibrators and dildos come almost exclusively in neon colours found nowhere in nature?

I mean, ok, you’ve got your boring white and black ones, and beige-ish looking ones that I guess are trying for a sort of ersatz Caucasian flesh tone, and of course you’re chrome bullet for that space-age feel, but honest injun, the vast majority of what was on the shelves were colours that would make a peacock feel drab. Green. Blue. Purple. Pink stripes. Leopard print pattern. I’m still surprised we didn’t see a plaid one.

Can anyone actually explain this? No, really, I wanna know. Were the people who make these things deprived of crayolas as kids, or what?

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11 Comments

  1. I think because for a long time the drab colours were all that were available, or incredibly impersonal colours like mirrorball silver. The wild riot of colour might reflect people’s desire to be more audacious and fun with their sexuality.

    That’s purely speculation, though.

  2. It’s a good question. I have really no idea.

    The I-Brators are in mac colors (maroon, teal, etc) and reasonably well designed, while the Natural Contours ‘brators are in pastels of various sorts (and differently well designed).

    What colors would you expect to see that you don’t?

    • It was not a question of not seeing colors we’d expect, but seeing colors we didn’t. I bet if we dug deep enough we WOULD have found plaid. They really did have leopard skin design, above and beyond every screaming shade of neon found in Tokyo and New York combined.

      • It is a little known fact that upon her posting as Muse of Erotic Toys, Erato had a minor nervous breakdown and was only able to be talked out of it through paintbox therapy. For years, Mt. Olympus looked like an explosion in a neon factory.

        At this point, she maintains her sanity by colouring things as brightly as possible, and occasionally attending Burning Man.

  3. The bright colors are easier to find in the dark.

  4. I think it’s a case of “Why not?” Personally, if I’m shopping for an *ahem* adult toy, I am more inclined to purchase the more whimsically colored items.

  5. I think some people are squicked if the toys look too real. I know that the texture of the cyberskin toys was a little freaky to me the first time I handled one. I would also guess for some people, who are interested in penetration but not interested specifically in male anatomy, the unreal aspect might be a bonus.

  6. Putting the ‘toy’ in ‘sex toy’, I’d speculate -- trying to project a fun and non-serious image.

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