Gwnewch y pethau bychain

Tag: amusements Page 3 of 17

Truth in Advertising, I guess

In the fridge at work today, I noticed a container of margarine left over from our recent summer office party. It was a Kroger store brand called, I kid you not, “Butter It’s Not!”

Wow. That’s a really bold stand for a product to make. “What’s in this container? Heaven only knows, but it’s not butter. Could be absolutely anything, but butter? Not a chance.”

This causes me to wonder two things: what names did the marketing geniuses behind this product *reject* before settling on “Butter It’s Not”. And who on earth is inspired to buy it based on that name. “Honey, go to the store and get some milk and cheese. But don’t get any butter!” “Ok, sweetie. Back in a bit.” ::trundles off to store:: “Oh good, here’s the no butter. I was wondering what aisle it would be on!”

Once upon a time, my friend Jim had a giant bottle of generic acetaminophen (paracetamol), which was labelled in giant block letters: NON-ASPIRIN TABLETS. I said, “Jim, you do realize that you have no idea what’s in this bottle, right? It could be anything. It could be arsenic. The only thing they’re willing to assure you is that it isn’t aspirin.”

It really does make you want to be a fly on the wall during the brainstorming sessions in the marketing department.

[Further amusement: I decided to go find a photo of this product to add to this post. A Google search turned up a perfect image, so I clicked through to it and, since it was on Flickr, checked the usage license. I was terribly amused that I had managed, in a google search of a random store-brand product, managed to select a photo taken by erinwrites. It’s a small, small world. Thanks to Erin for permission to use the photo. *grin*]

Zenspam

Most spam I delete within moments of recognizing it for what it is. But every now and then I run across something so incomprehensible, it *must* contain some seeds of enlightenment. I’m not one to pass up a free koan, just in case it will give me insight into the universe.

Today’s poetic musing:

“Our company we wish to create for you the best service. Be not ill Here you will see and will find about what many are silent do not speak. It is created for anonymity.”

Crossovers That Should Never Be #45992

This is such a horrible thought, surely someone’s done it already:

Superman/Moby Dick crossover: “Call Me Ishma-El”

Spam Subject Line of the Day

This was a random ED pharm spam, nothing to really distinguish itself from any of the other few that manage to slip past my defences. But the subject line of this one did catch me before I deleted it:

“How Can You Tell If Your Girl Is Satisfied (Sexually)?”

My immediate, somewhat bemused reaction: “Uh….she tells me?”

Seriously, maybe I’ve just been lucky with my partners, but it’s not that hard to tell that you’ve done a good job. Especially if your partner is someone you, y’know, have conversations with that feature polysyllabic words.

Conversations with #437

From today’s random lunchtime conversation with eloren:

eloren:

Shall we go?

autographedcat:

Nah, let’s stay here for the rest of the day.

eloren:

I agree with you in prinicple. In reality…

autographedcat:

Reality bites.

eloren:

Yes, it does

autographedcat:

Reality bites. Sounds like an appetiser. <announcer voice> New, Reality Bites. Small nuggets of reality, breaded and deep fried, and served with a dipping sauce.

eloren:

I’m not sure what you’re selling, but I don’t want any.

autographedcat:

But the sauce is awesomesauce.

eloren:

I was hoping it would be the tears of my enemies.

autographedcat:

The tears of our enemies is one of the primary ingredients of awesomesauce.

eloren:

Oh, well, that’s ok then.

autographedcat:

If you didn’t mix in the tears of our enemies, it would be awesomepaste.

eloren:

And that’s not appetising at all.

I adore eloren. Just sayin’

Mmmm

I just love girls with really big…..vocabularies.




(pointer courtesy willshetterly)

QotD

Oddest response a girl has ever given me to an overture of affection, ever:

“Well, if you were more like a scorpid…”

ETA: Perhaps its just that kind of day. Someone I’m actually dating just said to me: “If I were an alien wasp, I would totally use your flesh to nurture my young.” Which is really very sweet, when you think about it.

Kaamelott: The Perfect Fifth

Hysterical video that I picked up from jeriendhal.

Every Good Boy Deserves Favour….

I know one isn’t supposed to get too chuffed at one’s on cleverness, but today in #filkhaven, I crafted what I think is a very good Doctor Who mnemonic, considering I took all of 60 seconds crafting it:

Have The People Been Demanding Baked Muffins More Easily Toasted?

I leave the meaning of this as an exercise to the reader.

Geeky on so many levels

I don’t usually post these, preferring to just selectively share them with people I think might like them, but this one is so funny I couldn’t help preserving it here.


(Spotted first in skylarker‘s journal, and of course the hascheezburger RSS feed.)

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