Mr. President
by Robert Wynne and Jeffrey Williams
Music: “Mrs. Robinson” by Paul Simon
© 1998

We’d like to know a little bit about you for our files
G. Gordon Liddy’s on the air at ten
Please be sure to tell the truth and nothing but
Now could you please tell us where, with whom, and when?

(Chorus 1)
What have you done, Mr. President?
We know you wish this all would go away
Hey hey hey
What have you done, Mr. President?
Frankly we just didn’t want to know

Screwing in your office on a Sunday afternoon
Gonna raise an awfully big debate, yeah
Lie about it, dance around it, when you are deposed
Ain’t no way you’ll come out smelling like a rose

(Chorus 1)

Hidden in an office where nobody ever goes
Secret Service standing by the door, yeah.
Please answer every question in graphic detail
Did you do it on the desk or on the floor?

(Chorus 2)
Where have you gone, H.R. Haldeman?
Even Nixon never was so bold
Who ever thought in their wildest dreams
That Watergate could ever seem so tame?
Hey hey hey
hey hey hey

Another song about politics that’s hopelessly dated, but it was a lot of fun to write at the time. The whole controversy that inspired this song became ridiculous in short order, and I enjoyed poking fun at the media frenzy. Of course, I always enjoy poking fun at media frenzies.