Gwnewch y pethau bychain

Month: November 2007

DEFENSIVE PERIMETER: Six potions labeled “Drink me!”

After regrouping and resting for spells and healing, the party returned to the room where they fought the shapeshifter. They weren’t able to enter the small tunnels he escaped down, but they had found six potions of Improved Reduce Person in the chest he had left behind. After some consultation, it was determined that the duration of the potion should be at least five hours, but they’d have no good way to determine exactly how long it would last, so time was of the essence once they shrunk themselves.

Virko: Dammit, I’m gonna turn into a rodent!1
Sensei: Hi ho, hi ho, it’s off to work we go!
Priest: Oh, do shut up.

The potions shrunk them down to 1/4 their normal size. This had a variety of effects on their stats and gear, making them weaker but more agile, decreasing their weapon damage, and slowing their movement. They crept down the tunnel and found themselves in a small den with three badgers, who were immediately hostile. A fierce battle ensued, which the heroes eventually prevailed, discovering in the process that the shapeshifter was, indeed, a were-badger. The room was searched and some more of the lycanthrope’s treasure was found, but there wasn’t much time to wait around, since the timer on their potion was ticking away.

Priest: No rest for the….are we weary or wicked?

Pressing on with the aid of the crude map they had found along with the potions, they came to a large cavern with a stream running through it. Of course, in their diminutive size, the 7-foot wide river looked more like 30 feet. there were, however, three stepping stones in the center of the stream, which the druid decided to use for crossing. Unfortunately, he fell in and was attacked by a large cave trout, which thought these smallish adventurers looked like a tasty morsel. Unfortunately for it, they made fairly short work of it by virtue of just shooting arrows at it from the surface.

Sensei:Does anyone know the odds of shooting fish in a barrel?

The party wandered through more twisting caverns, making their way through a large rock-strewn chamber (and not staying long enough to find out what might greet them if they waited a bit), and crossing a crude rope bridge across a cavern. (I say “rope bridge”, but it was really just a rope. Fortunately, the thief was able to make a zip harness with her rope use skill and get them across without too many unnecessary skill checks.)

At last, the came to a smallish chamber with a ledge on the far side of the room, perched on top of which was a small dragon-like creature. It waited until they filed into the room, then immediately hit the party with what they mistook for fire breath from a baby red dragon. (In fact, it was a Burning Hands spell). They engaged the dragon and were well on their way to dispatching it when it suddenly began to talk telepathically to Virko, the main fighter of the group:

Dragon: Wait! Wait! Please don’t kill me! Don’t kill me!
Virko: Boy, did you pick the wrong party member to talk to!

The dragon, pleading with the party, offered them a pair of magic bracers, and also hinted that he could tell them who was behind the stuff going on in the town. Reluctantly, the party ceased combat and began to converse with the creature, actually a pseudodragon, who revealed that his name was Blackspine. From him, they learned a number of interesting things, in exchange for promising to spare his life:

1) Blackspine was the companion to a long-dead recluse who was a disciple of the god Crypticus, a deity with domain over secrets and forbidden lore.
2) The ringleader of the theft ring was, in fact, Melchor, the chief magistrate of the town whose mayor had requested the party’s assistance.
3) Melchor had, in fact, hired the assassin that killed the previous mayor, and was quite frustrated by his subsequent failure to secure political control.
4) The were-badger was under Melchor’s control and was the agent carrying out the thefts.
5) Melchor was using the monies gained from fencing the stolen goods to finance the hiring of a band of goblins to sack the town, during which the mayor would be killed and Melchor would be seen to heroically aid in the town’s defense.

At the end of the conversation, the party also insisted that Blackspine return any parts of his treasure horde which were on their list of goods stolen from the town, and promised to leave him alone after that, and began to prepare for the task of taking on Melchor himself.

Will they succeed? Does the crafty scoundrel have a few more tricks up his sleeve? We’ll find out next time, when our heroes once again form….a Defensive Perimeter.

1Virko, for reasons unknown, divides almost all creatures into two catagories: anything smaller than, say, a godlden retriever is a “rodent”, and anything larger than that is a “doggie”.

Doggerel for Telynor

It’s obvious now at the start of the day
When nothing quite seems to be right
That morning collects all the dues we must pay
For the fun we were having last night

And yet there’s a joy that morning light brings
If only you take time to feel it
A lightness of being, your inner heart sings
And you hide it lest someone might steal it

So shake off the shadows and cast off the fear
And let not a cloud hang above you
And know that the world was made special for you
And is full of the people who love you

DEFENSIVE PERIMETER: Catching Up To the Party

I apologize for the small handful of you who were actually interested in the story recaps of our little AD&D group. I fell down on my note taking and haven’t posted a summary. The party did manage to rout the kobolds who were attacking caravans and downed their leader, a magically mutated kobold warchief who had taken over this small clan. Once he had been defeated, the rest of the kobolds fled into the forests and have not been heard from since.

Here are the short form notes on the most recent two sessions. I’m afraid that the wisecracks and other levity that have been a hallmark of this series are missing, but it will get everyone caught up on the plot.

The party got sent up to a small frontier town north of Kelvin named Welwyn. There’s been a rash of thefts that the local populace has been unable to resolve, and they believe that the thief is utilizing the town’s well as an escape route. Our Heroes go down the well, and nearly die. (There was a snake in the well, but I think the well itself did more damage than the snake did.)

In between fighting the snake and trying not to drown, a secret door is discovered which leads into an underground tunnel. They followed the tunnel into a large cavern and fought a giant trapdoor spider. Then, they went down a tunnel which was laden with traps, found a secret door and fought four zombie dwarfs. Searching the room found a discarded piece of paper which was in code, but when unscrambled appeared to be a work order for the building of the portcullis and traps out in the hallway. The person who hired the dwarfs appears to have killed them and reanimated their corpses in lieu of paying them.

Venturing deeper in to the caves, the party encountered a dire badger, which they fought and killed, the thief sustaining some severe injury, but no deaths. They then ventured forth and found a man sitting at a campfire in a large cavern. Several small tunnels (too small for humans to venture through) led off, but there were no other exits. As soon as he became aware of the party, he snatched up a bow and attacked. The druid cast entangle, which greatly complicated the fight, as it hindered both friend and foe alike. The lone man used a set of pipes to call forth a swarm of rats, shapeshifted into a form that appeared to be half-human, half badger, nearly killed the duskblade, and finally shapeshifted again into a badger and disappeared down the small tunnels.

After healing and waiting for the entangle to expire, they searched the room and found various bits of treasure, some of which probably belongs to the townspeople. They also found several small harnesses, about hte size of the rats in the cave, and six potions of Reduce Size, Human.

Injured and out of spells, they have elected to camp for the night before deciding what to do next.


“Hey, sibs, it’s that time again!”
“Time to sing Banned from Argo backwards?”
“Time to count down the parodies of this weeks Top 40?”
“No! It’s time to get our registrations for Gafilk before the price goes up!”

That’s right, everyone. Just two weeks left to get your pre-reg to Gafilk 2008 at the low, low price of $30! We’ve got a great con planned for you this year!

Guests of Honour: Jeff & Maya Bohnhoff
Toastmaster: Brian Richardson
Interfilk: The Brobdingagian Bards

Plus the banquet dance! And the My Filk game show! And………another Super Secret Guest!

“Wow, who could it be?”
“We’re not telling! Not until December 1. Buuuuut…I wouldn’t wait that long!”

For your convenience, memberships and banquet tickets can now be bought directly from our webpage using Paypal. You can also mail your cheques to us by printing out the form on the webpage and mailing it to:

PO Box 702
Alpharetta, GA 30009-0702

Gafilk will be held January 11-13, 2008 at our new hotel, the Crown Plaza Atlanta Airport, right across the street from our old hotel.

“So people don’t get lost?”
“Nah. It’s just closer to the Waffle House.”

We’re looking forward to seeing each and every one of you there!

“Even that guy?”
Especially that guy. He does this great song about Henry Fitzroy and Nick Knight getting into an argument over who knows the most boneheaded police detective…”

For all the knitters on my friends list

Today’s Loose Parts goes out to all the knitters in the audience

Loose Parts by Dave Blazek

Today, our friends in the UK celebrate Guy Fawkes day, a holiday that most Americans find confusing because, near as they can figure, English history starts in 1585 and largely ends in 1814.

Luckily, scarletdemon wrote a lovely treatise on the history of the occasion a couple of years ago, and it’s still there for you to enjoy now.

In 1605, English Catholics were angry that they did not have equal rights, so their leader (Pope Trevor the Third) signed what Catholics call a “Fatwa” and sent it to Guy Fawkes to be carried out. Fawkes assembled a band of like-minded terrorists and they decided to assassinate King James I, his family, and most of the Protestant aristocracy, in one fell swoop, by blowing up the Houses of Parliament during the State Opening. They saw themselves as soldiers of fortune, helping people in need. But who were these desperate men? Guy Fawkes had chosen some of the best minds in pyrotechnic history: Himself, George Handel, Arthos, Porthos, Shakespeare, Dogtanian and fuse specialist Artemis Richlieu. Their famous cry of “Penny For The Guy And One For All!” has become a regular catch-phrase for children begging outside corner-shops (with their Guy Fawkes effigies), even today.

Go read the whole post. It’s delightful stuff.

20 Lyrics (Answers)

Well, the number of people scratching their heads and looking at me funny has slowed to a trickle, so I guess it’s time to reveal the answers, to better help you run off to iTunes and try to figure out what I’m talking about. If you still want a crack at the lyrics before looking at the answers, click here.

20 Lyrics

When asked to describe my musical tastes, the word I’d most often use is “eclectic”. And as a result, I’ve been meaning to get around to the whole “post lines from X songs and let people guess what they are” meme for a while, but just never got around to it.

So, tonight I have. Here’s a delightful trip through the familiar and the obscure that is known as “My iTunes on Shuffle”. Remember, no fair doing Internet searches! (As a note, I did skip over songs which either have no lyrics (duh) or which had the title of the song in the opening lines of the verse.).


1. Down by the river, the water’s running low as I wander underneath the trees

2. As I walk through this wicked world, searching for light in the darkness of insanity

3. The fly on the coachwheel told me that he got it and he knew what to do with it

4. They made up their minds and they started packing. They left before the sun came up that day

5. Politicians preaching on TV saying nothing but vote for me.Everybody everywhere, we got a love

6. Gonna take a chance on her, one bullet in the cylinder

7. Whatcha gonna choose the poison or the lines? Lived with crazy pain in all your life

8. You don’t have to take the bar exam to see what you’ve done is Ignoramus 103

9. Kelly is raising her son; his dad left just after the birth

10. So you think you’re a Romeo playing a part in a picture-show?

11. The Tupamaros got a platinum card, all right. I got a heart of gold and it’s time to get hard and I like it

12. He left a card, a bar of soap and a scrubbing brush next to a note that said “use these down to your bones”

13. Tears fill up my eyes I’m washed away with sorrow, and somewhere in my mind I know there’s no tomorrow

14. It don’t matter what you do, I don’t care what you say, It don’t matter where you go, honey

15. I was trained in Arizona in a secret desert camp where we did night manoeuvres without a lighted lamp

16. Here I go, going down, down, down; my mind is a blank, my head is spinning around and around

17. What may I ask is never enough; It’s never too sweet and it’s never too rough

18. Peter said to Paul you know all those words we wrote are just the rules of the game and the rules are the first to go

19. Floating in the summer sunshine, we are flying, we are blue; Falling like a summer raindrop, like a teardrop, like the dew

20. Lost track of what i had to get done, not meeting anyone, stuck in one place while the snowflakes all come down

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