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Author: autographedcat Page 64 of 211
Chair of Georgia Filkcon; musician, songwriter, essayist & dilettante-at-large. Almost certainly not what you expect. (they/them)

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Walrus Matilda
by Rob Wynne
TTTO: “Waltzing Matilda” by Banjo Paterson
I am he as you are he, you are me and we are we
See how they run like pigs from a gun
See how they fly and take a look at how I cry
Then go a-walrus matilda with me
Sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come
Corporation t-shirt, stupid bloody day
Man you’ve been a naughty boy, you have let your face grow long
So come a-walrus matilda with me
I am the egg man, I am the egg man
I am the Walrus, goo-goo-ca-choo
And we are in the garden, waiting for the sun to come
Who’ll come a-walrus matilda with me?
Mister City policemen, sitting in a pretty row
See how they fly like Lucy in the sky
See how they fly and take a look at how I cry
Then come a-walrus matilda with me
Yellow matter custard, dripping from a dead dog’s eye
Pornographic priestess, crabalocker wife
Boy you’ve been a naughty girl, you have let your knickers down
So come a-walrus Matilda with me
I am the egg man, I am the egg man
I am the Walrus, goo-goo-ca-choo
And we are in the garden, tanning in the English rain
Who’ll come a-walrus matilda with me?
I’m an expert texpert, I’m a choking smoker too
Don’t you know the joker is laughing at you
See how the pigs smile, take a look at how I cry
Then come a-walrus matilda with me
Semolina Pilchard, climbing up the Eiffel Tower
Elementary penguin, hare krishna song
Man you should have seen them kicking Edgar Allen Poe
So come a-walrus matilda with me
I am the egg man, I am the egg man
I am the Walrus, goo-goo-ca-choo
Everybody’s got one, stick it up your jumper, love
Who’ll come a-walrus matilda with me?
I am the egg man, I am the egg man
I am the Walrus, goo-goo-ca-choo
You can still hear Paul’s ghost, as he says to the carpenter
Who’ll come a-walrus matilda with me?
A bit of silly mashup inspired by a conversation on #filkhaven this morning.
Quarantine
by Rob Wynne
TTTO: “Closing Time” by Semisonic
[Verse 1]
Quarantine
Close up all the doors and don’t go out onto the street
Quarantine
Turn all of the lights out and stay under your blanket and sheet
Quarantine
Sitting on the sofa watching TV and drinking beer
Quarantine
You don’t have to stay home but you can’t come here
[Chorus]
I wish everyone would stay at home
I wish everyone would stay at home
I wish everyone would stay at home
Please stay home…
[Verse 2]
Quarantine
Time for you to stay there in the places you already are
Quarantine
There’s nowhere to go, ’cause they closed every café and bar
So just take off your jackets, put them in the closet
I hope at least you have a friend
Quarantine
Please stay safe inside until the outside is safe once again.
[Chorus]
I wish everyone would stay at home
I wish everyone would stay at home
I wish everyone would stay at home
Please stay home…
[Bridge]
Quarantine
Time for you to stay there in the places you already are
[Chorus]
I wish everyone would stay at home
I wish everyone would stay at home
I wish everyone would stay at home
Please stay home…
I wish everyone would stay at home
I wish everyone would stay at home
I wish everyone would stay at home
Please stay home…
[Outro]
Quarantine
Please stay safe inside until the outside is safe once again.
I have to thank Trace Hagemann for being my muse and inspiring this! He posted a link to Semisonic’s “Closing Time” and said it was his quarantine music for the evening, and this formed in my brain. I guess I’ve now written my pandemic song. ![]()