Gwnewch y pethau bychain

Tag: family

Falling off, climbing back on

Well, after a good start, I finally  hit a strech of not posting.  First was the weekend, which had little to note in it other than visiting Larissa’s aunt in Tacoma, which was lovely but uneventful.  We did caught up in some of the traffic generated by the President’s visit to our fair city, but all told it only added about 30 minutes to our trip home, at a rough estimate.

I’m pondering various content ideas to try and make sure I keep regular posting up, in addition to what I’m already doing with the Friday Five Digest.  But for now, just know that things are moving along at a lovely pace, and my silence is largely a result of not much to say.

How’s life going in your world?

Christmas and Me

Last night, thatcrazycajun made a post about his mixed feelings on the holiday season. I’ve been giving this some thought since I read it last night, because I’ve lately been of two minds about Christmas.

I love Christmas. I love the atmosphere it creates. I love winter. I love the lights, and the music, and the sheer joy that permeates every part of it. People are friendlier, and more giving, and more outwardly focused at Christmastime, and I love that.

I should note that I was raised agnostic. I’ve never had a deep, personal, spiritual relationship with the Christmas season, so my love for the holiday doesn’t have to get tangled up with how I feel about the actual implications of Christological mythology.

At the same time, I feel a little empty at Christmas, because Christmas is so very much about family, and mine isn’t here. It seems I never have the luxury of time to go and visit mine during the holidays, and even if I could, it’s been over a decade since my grandfather, the axis around which my entire family world revolved when I was a child, passed away. My cousins all have children, and have begun to spin their own family worlds, and having been absent the last 20 years, I’m not really a part of it.

Some years ago, I went to pick khaosworks up from bedlamhouse and ladyat‘s home on Christmas Day. I arrived as the family gift exchange was in full swing, and so I stood and watched a while waiting for Terence to be done. And watching it made me feel…not bad, really…but somehow that while I was certainly welcome to be there, I wasn’t really a part of what was going on. I was an observer, not a participant. And I realised at that moment what I deeply, truly, achingly missed from my own life — that sense of total belonging. I’m not entirely sure I feel it anywhere, any more.

kitanzi and I have our own little Christmas traditions. We’re low-key people, and we do low-key things. But there’s a part of me that really misses the noisy, warm, chaotic love of Christmas morning with the whole family gathered for food and gifts and running around the yard.

That’s what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.

The Weekend Review

The weekend was largely quiet, for one reason or another. Which isn’t do say it wasn’t filled with good social time.

Friday night, I learned that City of Heroes was having a free reactivation weekend. Games like CoH do this periodically, where they turn on all the accounts of people who left the game and stopped paying for access, hoping to lure some of them back to look at the cool new things they’ve done in the mean time. The last time I’d logged into CoH was about 3 years ago, so I figured “What the heck”, let’s see what’s new in Paragon City. It took me a while to get used to the controls, mostly because WoW and CoH have the Y axis of the mouse reversed. Once I adjusted for that, I bounced around on my old scrapper, Magic Librarian, and poked around the crafting system that has been added since I left, and ran some missions on the new alignment system, which looks cool. I’m tempted to start up my subscription again, just to have a fun little time-wasting game for days I’m especially bored. CoH is a superb “casual” game that you can dart in and out of, especially with some of the chances they’ve made. I’m particularly interested in exploring the new alignment system the recent expansion added.

Saturday, I had plans farther afield. Dina (onmeadmountain) was visiting her mom and dad for a week, including the weekend, and by the weekend her husband Don and their two oldest kids should also have arrived from their camping trip, making it an ideal time to see them. (Her parents live about 3 hours away, whereas they live between 6 and 7 hours away by car.) I got away from the house at about 10am, which was about an hour later than I’d hoped, but it was a soft clear day, and I had several long podcasts to listen to, so I was looking forward to taking my Prius out on its first proper road trip. (kitanzi elected to stay home and unwind, rather than take the trip.)

It was a reasonably uneventful trip until I got to Chattanooga, where I decided I wanted a beverage. I stopped at a gas station, and started to go inside, when I realized that I didn’t have my wallet. I quickly checked the car, and in the jacket I had tossed in the back seat, but it was in neither. I had obviously left it at home, which meant I had no ID, no credit cards, and $2.50 in quarters to my name. Not an ideal circumstance, but since I was already well over halfway to my destination, I elected to skip the beverage and go on up to the house.

I next had one of those lovely “I rely on technology too much” moments that are always interesting. When I approached Spring City, my GPS cheerfully informs me: “You are entering an uncharted area. Turn-by-turn directions will no longer be available.” Um, okay. No worries, right? I have a mobile phone, i’ll just call t hem and get the directions from here to the house. So I picked up my phone, and saw the words ‘No Service’. Well, isn’t that grand?

I figured that in the worst case scenario, I could stop and borrow a phone from the fast food place on Main Street, but I drove back and forth a couple of times first, looking for a clue. “Hrm, that street looks familiar”, I said, spotting a school about a block down from the main strip. So I turned down that side street and past the school, I found a road with a similar name to the road my destination was on, so I turned down it, and found the road I was looking for. I feel pretty impressed with myself for this bit of geographical memory; the last time I’d been to Dina’s parents house was for her baby shower for Kailyn. Kailyn is now 12 years old. 🙂

Having located my destination, I went inside to visit. I got to see the sailing ship Conner made out of tinkertoys, and Briana practice her rushing tackle. She packs quite a wallop for a not-yet-two year old. Kailyn was in the high energy whirlwind of someone who is just getting over being sick, which left her a bit wiped out and cranky by days end, and I’m afraid I may have spent some of the Good Uncle points I have accumulated when I brightly suggested she could practice her flute, a task I knew she was procrastinating on, when she complained of being bored. But she did in fact go and do that thing, and I heard her from up the stairs. She’s getting pretty good on that thing. I hope she sticks with it.

Most of the visit was just hanging out in quiet conversation, though. I geeked about sound reenforcement with Dina’s father, looked at all the gemstones that Don and the kids had collected during their camping trip to North Carolina, and we talked a bit about the house in Kentucky that I have yet to go and see. Eventually came a delightful spaghetti dinner with homemade banana bread for dessert.

Of course, no visit with Don & Dina and the children would be complete without some out of context quotes from the day:

  • “She hurt her face on my ear.”
  • “I’m so perky! No wonder I’m sick!”
  • “There you go! I’m like the Prius of Christianity!”

    The only down moment of the visit came when it was time to go. Walking down the stairs to say goodbye to Conner, who was watching TV in the basement, I felt something twinge in my calf and my leg buckled slightly. It was very painful to walk on, but I figured it was just a cramp and didn’t think much of it. I put ice on it briefly, tried to walk it off a bit, and figured it would work itself out. Since it wasn’t terribly painful unless I put weight on it, I collected hugs and drove home, using the cruise control to make sure I didn’t go too fast and attract any official attention, since I still didn’t have any ID on me. I got home a little after 11 and fell into bed.

    Sunday, my leg still hurt, so I spent a very quiet day split between more City of Heroes and a four hour block of Leverage. Monday, I called my doctor and was lucky enough to get an immediate appointment, so I hobbled in to get it checked out.

    After being poked and prodded (and scolded for not following up on something I was instructed to follow up on last time I was in), I was sent to the facility next door to undergo a procedure that would determine if there was a blood clot causing the pain. This was the one possibility that could have serious consequences, so they wanted to make sure and rule it out. Fortunately, that came up clear, so I was sent on my way with a prescription for diclofenac and orders to rest my leg as much as possible.

    So that’s all the news from Jefferson Creek. How was your weekend?

  • Continuing to be forthright, decisive, and above all, positive

    There are few decisions in this world that one makes without the slightest bit of uncertainty or doubt. Five years ago today, I made one of them, when I stood in an Atlanta courtroom and married kitanzi

    Happy anniversary, sweetheart. You’re the best partner anyone could ever hope for.

    This whole week can stop anytime.

    Overall, the weekend was pretty relaxing. Didn’t do much to speak of, honestly. Friday night was my weekly WoW date with catalana. We’re slowly creeping our way up…level 46 now, and aside from instances, which we’ve been getting regularly run through by 70 friends, we’ve run into almost nothing we could not handle together. I seriously doubt we’ll hit 70 by the time the expansion comes out in 2 months, but that’s ok. We’re not really in a hurry.

    Sunday was a bit of a down day, emotionally. It started out well — we went to the pool at the gym for a while, soaked in the hot tub, and came home for a nice brunch. It’s been a while since the last time we were at the gym, so I was pleased to discover that I’d lost 15 pounds since the last time I weighed in. I’d suspected this was the case, as my pants size has shrunk, but it was nice to see the scale reflect that as well.

    The afternoon came with a case of the blahs. There were a variety of reasons for this, some of which I had a finger on, and some of which I didn’t. Of the things I had a finger on, at least one was completely irrational and the other was something I had no real ability to do anything about, so I was fairly unhappy about the state of my head. This wasn’t improved when I got a call from my mother around 6:30pm, to tell me that my Aunt Barbara (her oldest sister) had passed away suddenly that morning of a heart attack. She was 65, the same age as my grandmother was when she passed away under very similar circumstances. Mom pointed out that our family doesn’t tend to go for the long lingering illnesses, preferring to stay healthy to the end and going suddenly, and I’m sure that on the whole, I’d prefer that myself, but its certainly a shock to those left behind. This whole week has been filled with news of people close to me dealing with unexpected death, and I really wish the universe would just cut it out.

    I made tacos for dinner and we watched the first episode of Alton Brown’s new show Feasting On Waves, which was much fun. I then logged into WoW for a while, and ended up pulling a guildmate and 2 other 50ish characters through about half of Blackrock Depths. This made for a nice distraction, and I have to admit it was fun to listen to the lowbie hunter ooh and ah as I dispatched the Dark Iron Dwarves and their minions. My guildmate has run me through more instances than I can count, so I was glad to return the favour to her.

    Around midnight, I decided it was getting late, but took some time to give sweetmusic_27 a call. By the time we were done talking, it was late, but I was in a better frame of mind. But I’d really like another Sunday to replace this one…I think it was defective.

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