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Rainy Day Argo #12 & #35 by Robert Wynne Music: "Rainy Day Woman #12 & #35" by Bob Dylan © 1999 Oh, they'll ban you when you beam down to that port They'll ban you when you are the spacer sort They'll ban you when you try to cruise the bars They'll ban you 'fore you ever get that far But I would not feel so in demand EVERYBODY must get banned! Oh they'll ban you if your captain tries to mate With too many partners in a pantless state They'll ban you if your engineer is able To drink everyone else under the table But I would not feel so in demand EVERYBODY must get banned! Oh they'll ban you if your First Officer there Teaches your bridge computer how to swear They'll ban you if your head nurse search is gainful and comes home naked with a walk that's painful But I would not feel so in demand EVERYBODY must get banned! Oh they'll ban you if your Chief Communicator Crafts a virtual clothing elimanator Theyll ban you if your gentle country healer Incites a riot by the town's local flesh dealers But I would not feel so in demand EVERYBODY must get banned! Oh they'll ban you if the man who drives your helm Uses plants the gov'ner's wife to overwhelm They'll ban you if the pirates at the bar Run away when they find out that's where you are But I would not feel so in demand EVERYBODY must get banned! Oh they'll ban you if your crew is Starfleet's best They'll treat you like you're some unwelcome guest We didn't mean to cause all of this fuss But it seem's thats always how it goes with us We're so sorry that it all got out of hand But EVERYBODY must get banned!
Another filk by free-association. Someone on rec.music.filk made a comment to the effect that EVERYONE should send a newbie a copy of Banned from Argo, and for some reason it triggered the phrase "Everbody Must Get Banned". I tossed out the first verse as an Insta-filk response to the original poster, then decided I should finish it before someone else did. This song was published in Xenofilkia #83 ("The Bastard Grandchildren of Argo" issue)
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